If You Can Dream It, You Can Become It

A friend of mine snapped this picture during a bike ride a few weeks ago and it has been an amazing source of inspiration to me. Not only is the photograph itself very nicely done, with the crisp blue sky and the very early spring greenery, but the content of the picture has special meaning to me personally. The hill that I'm descending is actually rather long and steep with the entrance in a sharp turn, and this was the first time I had attempted to ride it sans suspension. Being able to see myself objectively and remembering the uncharacteristic calm confidence I had at this particular moment in time reassures me that "I Can", which for me is a very powerful statement.

You cannot see anything that you do not first contemplate as a reality. - Ramtha

What The Bleep Do We Know?

I just experienced a couple of the most profound hours of my entire life. I refer to the time I spent with this movie - "What The Bleep Do We Know" - as "experienced" rather than watched because it delved into the deepest aspects of human nature, involving me as an active participant in such a way that referring to it as a "movie" just doesn't do it justice. I wish I could describe the depth and intensity of this film, but honestly words fail me. It presented such an astounding and wonderfully hopeful prospect of the capacity for a truly enlightened life - I am at a loss to reduce it to mere words. I do know that as the film progressed, I felt such a sense of hope and connection with the universe, and nothing short of sheer wonder and awe at the incredible beings we have the potential to become and the power we have to change our lives and the universe for the better simply by changing the way we think.

More indepth information about the film can be found Here

Detailed information about Dr. Masaru Emoto's astonishing research on water crystals can be found Here

Less Is More

Well, I'm approaching the end of my first week of training workouts written out specifically for me by Charlie. When I first reviewed the program, I'll admit I was skeptical. It seemed so sparse, and I just couldn't believe that it would be possible to really gain the fitness and strength I needed with such a streamlined appearing schedule. However, after just a few days, I'm pleasantly surprised at the efficiency and success of this seemingly sparse program. I can already see and feel a difference in my strength, my endurance and my aerobic capacity. My weaknesses have been identified and the program is working on those in a regimented, definitively progressive and systematic manner. Even at this early stage, I can see a dramatic increase in core strength and power. But perhaps most impressive is that by reducing the quantity and increasing the quality of my training, I'm finding that I no longer seem to be busily scurrying about, without really accomplishing anything except wearing myself down needlessly. Suddenly there is time to do everything I need to do, I feel more relaxed and focused, and am able to concentrate on those things that will move me closer toward my goal. My entire mental outlook is much brighter since I can rest comfortably in the knowledge that quality is more valuable than quantity when it comes to training - the visible proof is in my own physical and psychological improvement - just as Charlie predicted when I first voiced resistance at such a seemingly limited workout program, reminding me that frequently less really is more.

Goals

Charlie sent me my primary assignment last evening which was to answer a questionnaire about my goals - daily, monthly, race season, yearly, 2-5 years, and lifetime. While it initially sounded pretty simple, once I began writing, it became painfully obvious that I had never really set definitive goals for myself. I realized that my soul had basically been a homeless vagrant, wandering the universe randomly in search of itself. I think I learned more about my own psyche in those couple of hours staring mutely at that blank piece of paper than I have in a lifetime of scurrying about, working, going, doing, but not really ever taking the time to just "be" and find out who I really am. It was such a seemingly simple assignment, and yet so profound that I am even now at a loss for words to describe the intensity of the revelations it brought to my conscious mind. If you have never set forth to definitively name your own goals for today, next week, next year, YOUR LIFETIME, I would suggest you consider doing so. It could deeply and profoundly change your life, and reveal to you the remarkable person inside that you may not yet know.

Initial Assessment

I had my initial evaluation and fitness test last evening, and despite my apprehension about it beforehand, I actually left the shop feeling very reassured and more confident already. Charlie has a very "boy-next-door" friendly way about him that immediately put me at ease before the test began, so I was able to just relax and follow his instructions for the time trial. He sat by the trainer and recorded information off my heart rate monitor while he verbally guided me through the time trial, pushing me in stages up to the point of my lactic threshold, and then back down to recovery. He would periodically quietly tell me to "relax and breathe" when I would push too hard and would have me back off the pedaling intensity a bit. Then he would have me stand, gear up and sprint hard for a few seconds, back down to an easier gear and pedal steady, all the while reassuring me that I was "going exactly right", and occasionally even "your heart rate looks like you could ride like that all day", which was surprisingly encouraging for me to hear, especially after worrying that I had lost all my fitness through the course of my knee injury. At the end of the test, it definitely boosted my confidence and solidly reassured me that I was pursuing the correct discipline by choosing endurance cycling when he noted that "I can tell you're an endurance athlete" based on the collected biophysical data and commented that "you control your heart rate extremely well." He then went through and readjusted a few minor things on my bike like rotating the handlebar so the hoods were a bit higher, slid my saddle back, and moved my cleats a bit, and showed Steve how he measured those items so we could check the remainder of my bikes at home. At our next appointment, I will be bringing in all my mountain bikes and mountain bike shoes for him to check, set up and adjust so that they all fit correctly and the same. I will be receiving my heart rate data and zones later today, as well as my weekly workout schedule. He obviously still wants me to continue with my physical therapy exercises and stretches and the core strengthening cross-training which I've been doing all along. I feel very reassured and comfortable with Charlie's coaching style and expertise, and have total confidence in his ability to help keep me disciplined with my training to avoid reinjuring my knee. It's just going to be a long slow process, but I believe the ultimate rewards will be well worth it.

Why Spydersmom?

I was asked the other day by a friend why my nickname was spydersmom, so if you'll indulge me, I figured I would go ahead and share the story for those of you who may not have heard it before. It was February 10, 2000, just a couple of weeks after our huge snowstorm here. Although Steve and I already had a dog, a beautiful lab mix, Zoe, that we had adopted as a pup about five years earlier, for some reason on that day I had an uncontrollable desire - no a NEED - to go to the local animal shelter and look for another dog. Zoe was really more Steve's dog, and I wanted to adopt another as both a companion for her as well as for myself. So with a little urging, I convinced Steve to go with me to the Garner SPCA. We spent hours there, looking at and playing with the multitude of dogs they had available for adoption, but none seemed to be just the "right" one. Determined that "my" dog simply had to be there, I decided to make one last tour of the kennels. That was when I saw him. In the very last kennel on the right, D30, was the most humble and discouraged looking puppy I had ever seen. He was mostly black, with a white stripe that started on his face and went down under his chin, along his belly, all the way to his back legs, along with four white feet. He was sitting at the back of the kennel and appeared to have given up hope that anyone was ever going to adopt him. I noted on his ID card that he had been at the shelter for over a month already! I went inside the kennel and knelt down beside him. There was something in his eyes that just grabbed my heart and wouldn't let go, and I told Steve this was the one. I simply had to adopt him. The shelter personnel were kind enough to stay late so that we could take him home that night. The first thing he did was throw up in the back of the truck on the way home. Poor little guy - probably his first ride in a vehicle since being dropped off at the shelter as a stray. Once in our house though, Zoe welcomed him like her long lost best friend, and he immediately jumped up on the couch and went to sleep. Shortly after we got him home, we noticed that he would get very sore after minimal exercise and when we took him in for his veterinary physical, it was determined that he had been born without hip sockets. This resulted in two separate surgeries to remove the bilateral femoral heads, which required significant recovery time, but within a year he was one of the fastest running, most playful dogs I've seen in a long time, with a completely remarkable total recovery! For the past five years, this little whirlwind has been my best little buddy, following me everywhere, and showering me with puppy kisses constantly. He is absolutely wonderful with people, especially children, although a bit timid at times around other dogs. He is afraid of loud noises, but adores cats. He sleeps on the bed with us under the covers, loves vegetables, does my yoga poses with me, dances with me, runs along with me on mountain bike rides, rests on the bath mat while I shower, and shows off prancing around with a sock in his mouth anytime we have guests. He is my best little buddy, my confidant with whom I can share anything and know he won't tell, and my ray of sunshine every morning when I awaken to see his little nose pressed up near mine. After five years, I can't imagine life without him. So to explain where my nickname came from - as an avid mountain biker, I wanted to name him something bicycle related, deciding to call him Spyder, which would make me SpydersMOM.

Calm Before The Storm

I just got great news - Charlie Storm has accepted me as a coaching client! I'm thrilled about the prospect of finally obtaining the disciplined guidance that has been missing from my cycling career throughout all these past years of trying to "go it alone" and the guess work related to that. I'm really looking forward to having someone of Charlie's expertise and experience working with me, and am excited to begin training for the 2005 race season under his tutelage.